So... How do I write this post? I just... ugh. Ok. So something that kind of really hurt me happened. Not on PURPOSE or anything just... *sigh* I guess I should just get into this. But just a disclaimer this is like a story of from Friday to now so... It's gonna be a while. Please, before you start reading this, make yourself comfortable, Get something to drink, something to eat. You ready? Alright.
Ok so you guys know how I really like Cookie, right? Like, I like him so much it's borderline creepy? Yeah, ok. So on Friday I hear him and his best friend talking. And I decided to listen. Now I KNOW you're probably thinking like "Dani, why would you do that? That's so rude!" but HEAR ME OUT! They were standing right by my table. HOW WAS I
NOT GOING TO LISTEN?! Anyway so I'm listening and they start talking about this girl named Kendall. Now, she's actually really nice...ish. I mean, she's never been RUDE but she's never gone out of her way to be nice. She's actually one of Dancer's really close dance friend. So I'm like ok... why are they talking about her? And then Cookie's best friend start's smashing Cookie's name-his ACTUAL name-and Kendall's. And it takes my brain just a minute to process what just happened and that it's a SHIP NAME. And I'm just kind of sitting there like... in shock. Tomato and I had already finished the project that the people were working on and she was sitting at a different table so I call her over. She asked what was up and I just kind of whispered "I think he likes someone else." and you could just see the realization crash into her. She started saying "No! No! How do you know?" with like her hands covering her mouth. So I said "I heard him and ------- talking about it. (------- is his best friend) And she goes "Do you know who it is?" and so I say "One of the Kendalls" Because there are 3, one of them is actually a guy. And so she goes "He's gay. He must be. That's the only possible explanation for why he wouldn't like you." And I just kinda shake my head. Then Bomb.com calls me over to her table. She says "I have to tell you something that's going to make you sad." So I ask "Is it that Cooper likes someone else?" and she just nods. I walk back to the table me and Tomato were sitting at and go "Bomb.com just confirmed it." (I didn't call her Bomb.com I called her her actual name.) And Tomato goes "No! No! Oh my gosh I'm so sorry!" And then we had to watch a video in the class we were in (Social Studies, and it was about Mt. Everest because why not? \_(o_o)_/) And the whole time we watched it I bit my lip to keep from crying, I actually bit it so hard I tasted blood. So then the bell rang and I went to my next class (G.T. thankfully. That's where all my friends are and we didn't actually do anything). And I just BROKE DOWN. I started bawling and all my friends couldn't understand why. I eventually told them and yeah...
So then over the weekend it wasn't quite so bad. I just didn't think about it.
Then we went back to school on Monday and as soon as I saw him something inside me just kind of... broke. I didn't cry I just felt sad. And then angry. And I guess jealous. Because I found something else out yesterday. Now Cookie and Kendall are "dating." You know that type of middle school dating where nothing is happening it just means that they're taken. Yeah, that's what's happening with them. And I just... well let's put it this way... I was planning a murder at lunch. You know I've actually noticed that people have become used to my death threats and I really don't know if that's good or bad. Anyway, so that happened and I actually did cry once that day. Kendall is in my pre-athletics class and we sit so close together that I can hear what she's talking about even if I'm not trying to, and I heard her and two of her friends (who are also friend... type things of mine) talking about my crush and I just... couldn't handle it I guess. Oh, another thing that happened was when I pointed out Kendall to Tomato she goes "HER? But she's so ugly! You're a BIG step us from HER!" And I just was kinda like "...what?" Because Kendall IS pretty and I'm... not.
So that brings us to today. Today something changed. I still like Cookie, I'm still sad that they're dating. But I decided that even though she was better then me at most everything, I was still as good as her. So I went to school and I was having a fairly good day. Then Dancer betrayed me... Not really! She would never betray me. But she did bring Kendall to our table and I really, really wanted to just strangle her (which her? You'll never know. Honestly I think it was both). Then, I have this app on my phone that creates ship names for different people, and me and my friends were all having a jolly old time (what is my old-timey language rn?). Then one of Dancer's friends see what we're doing and ask me to do it for Kendall and Cookie and... well I did it. So that's something. BUT THEN GUYS GUESS WHAT!? Ok so we did the pacer today, and Kendall had already gone, and I asked what she got and she got 41. So I was like "Oh shooooooooot! There's no way I can beat that!" BUT I DID! OUT OF SPITE FOR KENDALL I ENDED UP GETTING 43!
43! THAT'S
20 MORE THAN I USUALLY GET! LIKE KUDOS TO ME! Anyway...
I think the reason that this hurt's so bad was because I haven't liked anybody this much since Hairdo, and we all remember how that turned out. (If you don't click
here and it'll take you to the post). And I thought that Cookie might actually like me because ALL my friends were telling me that he did and it was SO obvious. And I just... guys he's as weird as me. Do you know how RARE that is? He instructed me on how to GOUGE SOMEONES EYES OUT!! We also have the same taste in books! He's also sarcastic and smart and adorable and perfect and... dating someone else. I just ugh. But I'll get over it... or some horrible accident might befall Kendall.
Bye Sincerely
Dani Jones
